


Road to Ruin

by Cheyalinn_of_Tafth



Category: Academia (Anthropomorphic), Buhay Kolehiyo
Genre: Everyone Is Gay, Gay Pride, Gay Rights, M/M, Unresolved Romantic Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-28
Updated: 2019-06-28
Packaged: 2020-05-28 10:27:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19392220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cheyalinn_of_Tafth/pseuds/Cheyalinn_of_Tafth
Summary: Not knowing where broken hearts go, Manuel and Arem embarks on a roadtrip they'll never forget.





	Road to Ruin

**Author's Note:**

> HAPPY PRIDE MONTH MGA KA-BUKO!! this is my mumunting handog FOR PRIDE MONTH!!
> 
> love you all,  
> cheya
> 
> ps. title is from fall out boy's "alone together"

Arem, if he really can be honest, did not want to go.

He would rather stay in his laboratory working on his research all day long but there was something in Manuel’s request that had him coming along. He even promised.

Maybe it was because of all the alcohol he consumed that one fateful night that turned out to not-so-fateful and it betrayed him by making a promise he did not want to keep any longer.

A promise will always be a promise and Manuel has become someone Arem found out that he has a hard time saying no to.

But here he was, going down the elevators from his building in the wee hours of the morning. All because he could not back out from a promise. Maybe Manuel would not get serious and too into it like he usually does. Maybe they would just go around for a while. Maybe eat out somewhere near. Maybe, after that, they would just part ways like good dudebros.

Manuel was already there out by the side of the road. Arem itches to scratch his face as he approached the other man. Manuel raised a hand as if he did not think that Arem could really see that it was him. He was wearing a maroon shirt and a white khaki shorts with matching black loafers.

“Looks good on him. Lahat naman yata,” Arem murmured into his mask as he stepped out of the building and towards the side where Manuel had parked his car, waiting for him.

The security guard was already staring daggers at them. Maybe it was because Manuel already spent a lot of time in front of the lobby.

Arem sighed, “I told you, six! Five forty-five pa lang.”

Manuel looked away sharply, “Yeah, you did. I was a bit too excited, haha. Sorry.”

Arem met his eyes for a minute. The guy was not lying at all, or just teasing the hell out of him as he used to do. He took a deep breath and opened the door of the passenger seat, “Tara na nga.”

Once they were settled inside with their seatbelts on, Manuel started the engine and they were able to hit the road in no time.

“Have you slept?”

Arem looked as if Manuel just told him that Arem can still graduate on time, with matching Latin honors.

“Even a nap?”

“Mukha bang meron?”

Manuel snorted, “You can sleep here in the car while I safely get us there.”

“Saan ba yang ‘there’ mo? Where are we even going?” Arem looked outside, trying to figure out where they were head. It seemed like they’re going south. Seems like?

“It’s a surprise, of course! I did tell you that I will get you somewhere no one will find us. You promised you will,” Manuel turned on the radio in the process before putting back his hand on the steering wheel.

Arem should not be thinking of this at all but watching Manuel drive calms him for no reason. It was as if he really feel like he was safe no matter what.

“Uy, pangit damit ko. Baka naman sosyal diyan sa pupuntahan natin,” said Arem.

“Nah, you’d be fine. It’s not like that,” smiled Manuel as he kept his eyes on the road in front of him. “Please, just enjoy. Okay?”

Arem wanted to agree but his stomach growled loudly in protest. Manuel gave out a short laugh, a sound that Arem never heard from him before. This is one of the times that Arem seriously thought that he should be some kind of alien or a clown. Because he was one of the handfuls of people who can see Manuel’s expressions. It was something he prided himself in, though, these past few months.

But Arem would never tell another soul anything about that.

“So, wanna eat somewhere? We can find a parking space if you want. Any cravings?”

“Hala. Baka traffic na kung dine in tayo. We can McDo? Drive-thru lang?”

Manuel maneuvered the car, “Sure. No worries, ‘Rem. You’re in good hands.”

Arem caught sight of those long, slim fingers before looking away. He sighed as he tried to erase the memory and all of the other things his lonely brain immediately associated that with… that. He took a deep breath to hopefully calm his mind and his stomach. Both did not listen, though.

He stayed looking out the window like that until Manuel pulled into the drive-thru.

“Arem? Your order? Don’t worry, it’s on me. I was the one who asked you anyway so I thought I would not let you spend anything on this trip,” Manuel said.

“Hala.”

“Hala? It’s fine. What do you want?”

“Fries, I guess. Burger. Or kung ano na lang ‘yung bibilhin mo,” shrugged Arem.

“Burger and fries po. And coke float na rin po,” Manuel said to the staff. “Make it two orders po. Thanks!”

The staff processed his order quickly and soon enough, they were already driving away from the establishment, going back on the road. Arem got the bag of food on his lap, the heat already transferring onto his white pants.

Manuel spoke without looking at Arem, “It’s fine. I’ll eat later. Or… If you want to feed me, I would have nothing against that. Totally welcome. But you eat na, please.”

“Wha…? What…?” Arem looked down at the bag, furiously blushing. His hands trembled as he brought out the bag of Shake Shake Fries. He added the flavoring before shaking the bag. Because of his still trembling hands, two fries slipped out and onto Arem’s blue shirt. “Ay!” He exclaimed as Manuel stopped by the red traffic lights.

He then reached out to take the fries on Arem’s shirt and offered them to the navy-eyed boy, “Say… Ahh!”

“Ah?”

Arem did not know what to respond but to obey. Manuel gave him a light smile as he let him eat the fries from his fingers. After that, he licked the oiled fingers in hopes to remove the grease. Arem could not let out a sound as he was equal parts embarrassed and mortified.

* * *

Manuel was trying his hardest not to look at the person sitting on his passenger seat right now. He should keep his eyes on the road. He should keep driving as smooth as he could in order to make him feel as much comfort as he deserves. It was really hard, though, so almost wished that the red traffic lights can last forever so he can look as much as he can.

It was weird at first, after knowing Arem also looked at a certain blonde the same way as he did. It was never something more than admiration, more than a cute crush that made their heart thump in their chests as the small older man walked by them. He was cute and he was a ray of sunshine. Manuel had to admit that he fell in deep. Arem, too, this he knows.

Hell may know what happened after that. He started to spend time with the guy beside him because of their so-called solidarity and though it may remain true for Arem at this time, for Manuel it was slowly but surely graduating into something different, something more serious, something that will get him deeper. Maybe even rock bottom.

The silence stretched out between them until Manuel was a bit trying to grasp the thought of doing something, anything. So, he reached out to play music. In his periphery, Arem brightened up solidly.

“You can choose any song you like. I have an aux cord, too. If you prefer using your phone,” he offered. That should not be too imposing.

Arem nodded as he browsed through Manuel’s song collection that he was able to put together the last minute before driving to Arem’s building. He was grateful for his past self for this little accomplishment.

“Ah! Shuffle,” mumbled Arem as he chose the option.

A song started to play. With the first notes, Manuel started to sweat just a little bit. It was the song he regretted not deleting from his playlist. It was mainly because he never thought it was going to be played, like at all.

_Heto ka na naman kumakatok sa’king pintuan_

_Muling naghahanap ng makakausap_

Manuel took a deep, calming breath.

_At heto naman ako nakikinig sa mga kwento mong paulit-ulit lang_

_Nagtitiis kahit nasasaktan_

He caught Arem bobbing his head along just a little bit.

_Ewan ko bakit ba hindi ka pa nadadala_

_Hindi ba’t kailan lang nang ika’y iwanan nya_

_At ewan ko nga sa’yo parang balewala ang puso ko_

_Ano nga bang meron siya na sa akin ay ‘di mo makita_

Maybe it was not so bad. Maybe Arem would not think of it as something else.

_Kung ako na lang sana ang ‘yong minahal_

_‘Di ka na muling mag-iisa_

Manuel heard Arem humming.

_Kung ako na lang sana ang ‘yong minahal_

_‘Di ka na muling luluha pa_

Yeah, maybe it was not so bad.

_‘Di ka na mangangailangan pang humanap ng iba_

_Narito ang puso ko naghihintay lamang sa’yo_

Manuel found himself humming along.

_Heto pa rin ako, umaasang ang puso mo_

_Baka sakali pang ito’y magbago_

_Narito lang ako kasama mo buong buhay mo_

_Ang kulang na lang mahalin mo rin akong lubusan_

Then, he was smiling. He hoped Arem was smiling too, behind that mask.

_Kung ako na lang sana ang yong minahal_

_Di ka na muling mag-iisa_

_Kung ako na lang sana ang yong minahal_

_Di ka na muling luluha pa_

He spared half a second of a glace. Manuel faced the road ahead immediately.

_Di ka na mangangailangan pang humanap ng iba_

_Narito ang puso ko naghihintay lamang sayo_

_Kung ako na lang sana_

His eyes, ever unconsciously expressive to him, were smiling. For Manuel, that should be enough for now.

The song died down to its last few notes as it ended. At the same time, they met a little traffic. Manuel can finally look at him for more than a second. Arem, though, was looking away. What Manuel did not expect, though, was Arem asking him this as he half-expected an awkward silence.

“Do you think Tomas is cute?”

Manuel blinked, “Of course. You and I know that the best, right?”

“That’s fair. Did he look cuter, now?”

“Well…” Manuel recollected the last time he seriously looked at the blonde object of their affections. It was the moment he also caught Arem staring after him and maybe stared at the tall, masked guy instead. Of course, Manuel would never say a peep about that. “He had always been cute. Just like how we find him as usual,” he settled.

Arem nodded, “Hopeless ka pa rin, noh?”

“You have no idea,” Manuel gave out a short laugh.

“Same.”

“I don’t know if I were ever not hopeless in whatever I do… for whoever it may be. Haha.”

“Talaga? Feeling ko ako rin.”

Manuel hummed, “Were you able to go home okay from Salle’s birthday party two weeks ago?”

“Uh, yeah. I’m still alive, ‘di ba?”

“True but you were so drunk then that you promised to get away with me,” Manuel said as he checked the emotions that passed through Arem’s face.

It was, have always been, amusing.

“That’s… Lasing ka rin kaya! You were also too drunk! Enough to ask me to get away with you!”

“You still promised.”

“Nagtanong ka pa rin!”

“You promised! There was consent!”

“There would not be a promise if you did not ask in the first place!”

“So… You would not go on a trip with me if I never asked you?”

“Malamang! Sinong sasama sa hindi naman nag-yaya?”

“I see,” Manuel smiled to himself. “If we were to turn back time and we were sober at that time, would you still agree to go to this wonderful adventure with me?”

The congestion loosened and Manuel’s eyes went back to the road, cutting their banter off. Manuel wanted to say something but Arem started to mutter.

“Well, of course, sasama ako. We’re like… sawi friends! Sawi friends can never leave each other! Mag-so-soul searching tayo today!”

“Well, we’ll see about that. Shall we?”

“Sure.”

When Manuel did not say anything anymore, he looked at Arem after a few minutes. He found the other man sleeping soundly.

“Finally, he was able to get some sleep. Really cute.”

* * *

“HUH?”

Arem woke up with a start as a horn blared loudly against his ear. He jumped on his seat and the 'ffvvtt' sound of his seatbelt grated against his shoulder.

Then, everything was wet and very, very cold. Like a lot of damn ice fell on him.

He looked down on his clothes. Not only chips and chips of ice, but also ice cream and a lot of coke now soaked his blue shirt.

"That… should really wake you. I guess."

Manuel was unfazed. Arem wanted to hide in the trunk.

He took some tissues from the bag and pressed them on the big wet blotch of wetness near the hem, in hopes to stop the dripping to continue down to his pants.

For Arem, it was a little bit agonizing. It should have been the cold or the inconvenience of wearing a ruined shirt. But no, it was how close Manuel's hand is down… there. He was just helping him but Arem's brain was not just ungrateful but also had the audacity to really go… there.

The disrespect, right?

“You should probably get rid of the shirt.”

“AHH?”

Arem is, more or less, not really mortified. Not at all. He was also not flustered and became an incoherent mess. He is okay. He really is. He is calm and the personification of tranquil. Everything is serene in that very moment.

That was, of course, all lies. Lies.

“We need that off if you want to feel comfortable. Carbonated drinks tend to be sticky if it dries up on your skin,” said Manuel. “My hoodie’s in the backseat.”

“Ha? Eh…”

“Don’t worry, I won’t peek. Want me to stop for a bit for you to transfer to the backseat?”

“Ah, ‘wag na. Hassle pa,” Arem replied as he looked away. He lifted the hem of his shirt and removed it. He looked at Manuel who really was not looking. Arem could not help but be grateful. At least the guy with the ripped body would not have the displeasure of seeing all of his stretch marks and bulging gut.

He quickly reached for the discarded maroon hoodie from the backseat. Arem inserted both of his arms inside and shrugged down the rest of the hoodie. He was able to bask in the smell as the garment fit him well. Manuel, without a doubt, really does smell nice. The hoodie’s design was simple, just a big white “U.P.” on the front and a smaller “MNL” right below it.

Arem then remembered that Tomas wore a similar-looking hoodie a while back. He smelled the fabric against before asking, “Kay kuya mo ‘to?”

“What, no. His was the one from Diliman.”

“Ah. Nakita ko kasi si Tomas dati… Maybe magkamukha lang.”

“Yeah,” agreed Manuel. “I saw him too. Tomas, I mean.”

Maybe it was time to change the topic. Arem decided to revert back to what they were about to do. He looked at the road. They were still in the middle of the expressway, but it looked like they were really headed South all this time.

“Saan ba talaga tayo pupunta?”

“You’ll see.”

“Kapag ‘yan sa hotel, ha!”

Manuel barked a laugh. Arem wanted to melt. He actually got flustered by the joke he just made, if his half-hope can even be considered as a joke at all. It was worth it because the mood inside the car was lighter. Even if Arem himself felt like going home by the number of failures he already accumulated through the short time they have been together for this trip.

“So, saan?”

“We’re a bit near, so you will see. Promise,” Manuel replied with a smile of his own. It was a bit devilish, maybe a smirk. And if he had the choice, Arem would have been swooning.

Finally knowing where they were heading to had consequences Arem ended up disliking. Manuel drove around the same vicinity for the third time, in hopes of having a car drive away and leave an open space for them to park.

Arem could not help but snort, “Na-ri-realize mo naman na nasa amusement park tayo. Pero walang parking space at hindi ka na amused.”

“Haha,” Manuel replied as he tried not to snort himself. “You think you’re so funny, ha? Yawa.”

“Pero seryoso? Enchanted kingdom?”

Manuel turned the steering wheel as they tried to go back to the side of the lost they just passed by as a pickup finally pulled out from parking, “Isn’t that staple for anyone who wanted to get away from everything? They said the magic stays with you, right? Maybe once we leave later…”

Arem gave Manuel a fake shocked expression, “Leave? Grabe ka talaga. Hindi pa nga tayo makakapasok, leave ka agad. Ikaw talaga.”

“What now?”

“Nothing. Hindi ko lang talaga na-expect na dadalhin mo ako dito.”

“Really?  
  


“Yeah.”

“So, where did you think?”

“Hmm…”

“You’re not serious about the motel, right?”

Arem almost got whiplash, “Hah?”

“I mean! If that was just it, there are so many places in Manila! If that were the case, then we shouldn’t have gone here. So, that must be out of the list! Right?”

“Malay ko ba!” Arem was full-on blushing now. “Defensive mo!”

“Fine. Fine, defensive. Sure,” Manuel deadpanned as he started to maneuver the car into the parking space. He visibly looked relieved as he successfully managed to do it.

“Let’s go?” He asked Arem as they get off the car. He pressed the lock and the car beeped, signaling that it was locked.

Arem followed bashfully as Manuel led the way. Miraculously, there were not many people in line towards the entrance. Manuel took his already-bought tickets from his back pocket and handed him one. Arem felt his eyes bulge out of their sockets as he stared at it. 

He realized Manuel planned this early. Too early that he already secured day passes. Arem being socked is a total understatement. No one has done this for him since like, forever. The whole thing is… surreal.

The staff was, of course, staring bluntly at Manuel the moment they stepped near her for him to give out their tickets. She smiled blindingly at him, “Good morning, sir! First time to visit?”

Manuel handed the ticket with a straight face, “No.”

“Ah, really? Mag-isa ka lang, sir? If you were open po, I can personally show you around once my shift ends in ten minutes.” The woman was still smiling so while as her eyes checked out the man before her. She almost absentmindedly placed the wristband pass around Manuel’s wrist as she continued to stare at him.

“I have a companion already,” Manuel looked at Arem as he passed the turnstile entrance and stepped in the park a bit. “I believe we are on a date. Right?”

Arem timidly gave the ticket to the staff before looking at Manuel, “Ah… Well, are we?”

“Of course, we are,” Manuel replied without emotion on his face like he usually does around normal people.

The staff gave a loud disappointed sigh as she handed the wristband instead of putting it on him. Arem stepped into the turnstile but it would not turn at all. He was stuck inside. He tried again, and again, and again but there was no movement.

Arem could have sworn it was because of the staff as she already was wearing a pissed off face. She sighed, “Ay, sir. Baka nasira. Tawagan ko lang po ‘yung mag-aayos.”

“What happened?” Manuel approached them again and Arem saw a bit of worry on his features.

She smiled at him so wide Arem thought she might break her face, “Nasira po kasi, sir. Tumawag na po ako ng mag-re-repair. Saglit lang po, please. Dito na po muna kayo. Sorry po for the inconvenience.”

Arem felt so humiliated as the line behind him was transferred to another lane in order to not cause any more delay for the rest of the people trying to get in. Why it must be him, though? He can feel eyes on him and them seeing him as the person who got stuck in a turnstile was the least in Arem’s list of things he wanted people to see him as.

And the fact that Manuel prepared so well for this day only for him to utterly destroy it? Arem’s chest started to sink.

* * *

It took a bit for the turnstile to be repaired. It was awkward for Arem, Manuel thought, as the repair guy moved in front of his lower torso to fix the contraption. He was getting a bit pissed though, as the maintenance dude started talking to Arem and asking him if he was okay and consoling him for a bit. Because it was supposed to be his job to cheer his companion up and not someone else. Arem clutched his body bag strap as he approached Manuel after the mishap.

“I’m sorry.”

Manuel already rehearsed in his head what he was going to say, “Why? What for? Things happen. It’s fine, you know.”

“No. You prepared for today. Here I am, sinisira ko lang. I’m really sorry.”

Manuel placed his arm around his shoulder, “You did not ruin anything. Please believe it when I say things. When did I ever lie to you?”

“Well…”

“Well… There’s a few exceptions but you know what I meant.”

Arem finally nodded as his eyes brightened. Something that Manuel really liked to see. Something Manuel aims to see as much as possible. As much as it is possible for him to.

“Where do you wanna go first? Are you hungry?”

“Ah, no. Busog pa ko from kanina. We can try the rides if you want?” Arem opened the map, “May plans ka na ba?”

Manuel could not help the grin. He was busted.

“Ah, of course you did plan everything. See? I don’t wanna disappoint you kasi nag-effort ka nang sobra.”

He hummed as he pressed Arem against his side and rubbed his shoulder, “You can never disappoint. For me, at least.”

“Oh. Okay.”

“You wanna try that Flying Fiesta ride?”

“Sure.”

They walked towards the location of the ride based on the map. Manuel watched Arem look at the paper with so much seriousness. Is he enjoying the day enough? Does he even sound cool? He wanted to sound cool for Arem, reasons currently unknown though. And he just wanted his companion to enjoy his day. To make the time he gave Manuel worthwhile for him.

“Hey, Arem.”

“Hmm?”

“Am I a roller coaster?”

“Why?”

“Because I am gonna give you the ride of your life. One you can never forget.”

Arem snorted as he slapped Manuel’s shoulder. He rolled his eyes, “‘Ina mu. Korni ka.”

“No? Then, this. I hope you like fireworks because this day will end with a bang.”

Arem laughed through his mask, “Kainis. Kala mo funny ka, ha?”

“Maybe I am.”

“No.”

“Well, wanna ride my log?”

“Pakyu ka.”

Manuel chuckled. The issuance of pick-up lines was lost on them both as they arrived at the ride. There were not many people in line, so they were allowed to enter and join the batch they were currently filling up. He took Arem’s hand and led them to one of the vacant two-seaters. The one usually reserved for couples.

He realized Arem just started going with the flow. Maybe that can allow Manuel to give him the full enjoyment of what he planned for the rest of the day.

The ride started and Manuel grasped Arem’s hand, giving it a light squeeze. His heart clenched as Arem squeezed his hand back.

* * *

The succession of rides that they were able to ride right after was a breeze as adrenaline and a lot of other chemicals and hormones entered Arem’s brain. Serotonin. Dopamine. Oxytocin. Maybe endorphins, too. The happy hormones continued to make Arem high enough to smile all the time behind his mask, his troubles and everything else that causes him immense stress and lack of sleep momentarily faded away.

They went to the Rio Rapids and then the Log Jam after that. And then the Anchors Away and then the EKstreme tower so that their already wet clothes can dry up really fast. Which worked for the most part. Even Arem was a bit amazed even though he wanted to throw up. Just a little bit.

Now, he was munching on little donuts sprinkled with sweet powder.

“Where to next? Wanna Space Shuttle with me?”

Manuel looked at him and smiled, “I see. Let’s take a rest first.” He took a donut from the bag and are it before taking Arem’s wrist as they walked towards the claw machines and arcade game machines near the roller coaster.

“Any prize you like?”

Arem looked around. He was hard to decide. There were so many colors and shapes around him.

Manuel chuckled, “Ah. Alam ko na.” He pointed at one of the claw machines that has stuffed toys of foods like sushi, hotdog, bacon, egg, and others. “You see that siopao? Imma get it for you.”

“Ba’t siopao?”

“Looks like your face.” Manuel replied as they made their way towards the place where you can exchange your cash into playable tokens.

Arem snorted loudly he followed the older guy, “Tangina mo. Kala mo funny ka? Paano naging siopao?”

Manuel went over and slipped five hundred pesos towards the cashier lady. “Very round, for starters. I have been observing for a while and I can attest that it is, indeed, siopao-like.”

Observing for a while? Arem almost choked. Did he really? Was he being watched by Manuel for weeks now? Days? Months? He would never ask anything like that, though. As if he can. Especially when Arem already knew that he was just bluffing, and his eyes never swayed from Tomas.

Just like him. Exactly like him. This was how this friendship started anyway. Without that connection that bound them together in a sense, Arem can really doubt if the friendship can even stand alone.

When he realized that they already walked towards the said claw machine, it was because the machine sprung to life as Manuel dropped in a token. As expected, there was no easy way to get it. By the time that Manuel was already furrowing his eyebrows as he maneuvered the claw, no tokens left for another chance, when he finally saw the huge siopao being dropped into the claiming box.

Manuel laughed as he took it and handed it to Arem immediately, “Ha! Finally. Here, as promised, for you.”

“Alam mong you just used up the amount you can just buy this one from the mall, right?” Arem squeezed the siopao a bit, testing it. It was nice.

“Well, I want the effort that came with it. Makes me look cool to you,” he grimaced.

“You’re already cool,” shrugged Arem.

“Really? Then, you should be cool too. For… for the person you really like.”

Arem thought the reply was a bit off but decided to brush it off. Maybe he heard it wrong. “Sige nga, paano?”

“You can ride the Space Shuttle with me.”

“Pota naman.”

“Why? We’re already here and we already finished so many rides. Nothing can hurt anymore, if you ask me.”

“But you should ask me!”

“I already did, though. Well, okay. So… Do you want to ride with me?”

“Uh…”

Manuel leaned down with a smirk Arem was sure he never let anyone see before. “If you really won’t, I’ll kiss you.”

“Gago ka,” was the most coherent thing he can say.

“Yep. I’m gonna kiss you. Right here. Right now.”

Arem quickly looked around. They did have a bit of an audience, mainly women who have, of course, taken a liking to Manuel. He did the sanest thing ever and grabbed Manuel’s hand.

“Tara. Sasakay tayo.”

“That was easy.”

“Pakyu ka talaga.”

He heard Manuel let out an airy laugh as he took him towards the entrance of the huge ride. So, maybe, he will die today. Right here. Right now.

* * *

Manuel was relieved Arem did not exactly die.

The dangerous thing that happened though, was Arem’s mask was torn off because of the wind during the ride. Now, the younger guy was pouting as he already sulked right after. He told Manuel, repeatedly, that his extras were in his bag they left in the car. Maybe he wanted to go back for it, but the day was already ending.

“Hey.”

“Yeah?”

Arem looked at him. Manuel must be crazy to feel weird as he looked at him and saw his cute nose and his… Ah, fuck... cuter pair of lips. They must be soft but it was something Manuel can never think again. He would not dare risk dissolving the only thing their friendship was founded on. And that was having an unrequited crush on the same guy. This is the best he can come close to.

“Wanna go Ferris Wheel? The sun’s gonna set anyway. We can maybe enjoy the view?” Manuel chose to be a bit honest, though. “Really, let’s go. I want to make you feel better.”

“Okay.”

“Sure?”

“Oo nga. Kulet.” Arem jabbed his side very lightly before he walked on ahead.

They were both looking outside as the wheel lifted them up. The sunset was beautiful. He could not look at Arem’s direction for some reason. Was it because they were actually in an enclosed space? But they were already walking around side by side and riding everything else besides each other. How can it be awkward now?

“Hey.”

Manuel looked at Arem as he called. He was clutching the siopao stuffed toy against his chest.

“Yes, Arem?”

“Katulad ng maraming bagay, alam mong first time ko ‘to talaga. You know, doing something like this with somebody.” Arem smiled and Manuel found it more beautiful than any sunset ever.

“I guess… It can really be nice to have someone like that. Someone who I can relate my feelings with a hundred percent. Someone who understands things about me.”

“Like?”

“Love troubles, for once. Weird, but okay. We both like Tomas and we should be rivals in a normal setting, trying to get his attention for ourselves and not letting the other get it. Instead, nandito tayo. Friends and stuff. It’s real nice.”

“Maybe that’s because he would not look at either of us like that anyway?”

“Haha. Maybe that.”

Manuel nodded to let Arem know that he understands. He felt his chest sink down to his feet at the same time. He wanted to reach down and pick it up, but he could not understand why it sank in the first place.

* * *

Arem sorely believes that he thoroughly embarrassed himself back there. He was still hugging the siopao stuffed toy as Manuel drove from the parking lot and back on the street.

“Care to have dinner with me?”

“As you said. Nandito na tayo, so why not?”

“Hmm. Okay. Pero baka kasi traffic? Though, I did reserve at a time that accounted for that.”

“Haha. Of course. Ikaw pa.”

“Huh?”

“You always plan ahead. You don’t let anything get past you. That’s kinda cool.”

“Thanks for thinking I’m cool, but sadly there are some certain thing I cannot really stop or consider. They just pop out and I guess that can be okay, too. Surprises in life can sometimes be good.”

“I see. ‘Di ba? That shit’s cool too. You saying stuff like that.”

“Thanks.”

“San tayo kain?”

“As I said. Surprises can be good.”

“Fine,” replied Arem as he started to fiddle with the downloaded car music. He felt a bit more comfortable now. Considering how he was earlier today, though. He can be much more at ease, that was maybe because being with Manuel for hours can placate him. Even if he was thinking so much about so many things rather than enjoying everything a hundred percent.

The next thing he knew, though, was that they were back to a parking space. He immediately felt the cold as he stepped out of the car and closed the door. He looked around, frowning, and he saw where they were.

“Tagaytay? Totoo ba?”

“You can see for yourself.”

“I did! I do! The fuck? Baket dito?”

“Why not? It’s nice. Mia, Neo, and Kuya went here a few months ago. They told me it’s really good. It’s a hotel, too.”

“That’s the point! It’s a hotel! Overlooking Taal!”

“Yeah. That’s good, right? Let’s go. I reserved for the two of us.”

They started to walk towards the main building. Arem still could not recover from the initial shock of the sudden turn of events, so to speak.

“The fuck you’re doing this?”

“You know that already,” replied Manuel. “Because you said you’d go with me anywhere.”

“But I don’t know where you’re going.”

“You can choose to go, if you want. I’ll give you a ride back to your place…”

As Manuel’s face fell, Arem’s chest constricted so tight that he initially thought his heart was having bad cramps.

“No, I… I don’t know where you’re gonna go but I choose to go there. To wherever you’re going.”

Manuel offered a hand, “Say no more. I’ll be there with you."

The dinner overlooking Taal was nothing short of spectacular. Arem has never been with just someone in places like this. Usually, it was with his sister and all of their friends and neighbors. It was chaotic enough that Arem gets swept away with the conversation and everything else. He failed to enjoy the view and the place every time.

This time, it was hella different.

Arem can hear the music clearly. He can feel the ambiance completely. He can stare outside as he chewed the juiciest steak ever. There was also wine served even though Arem only entertained the thought of drinking because of Manuel. Sure, can indulge the guy after everything that has happened today.

“So, is it to your liking?”

“Hmm?”

“The place, I mean. The food. Everything so far?”

“Ano ‘to, feedback form? Evaluation committee ako?”

Manuel only chuckled, smiling a bit. That meant he was serious about actually expecting an answer from him.

Arem cleared his throat, “Well. Everything has been really wonderful. It’s nice. I never experienced any of this before.”

“Never gone to dates, then?”

Arem’s cheeks were set aflame, “What, of course not! I can barely get a crush’s attention. Paano pa kaya feelings. Ano ka ba? Kilala mo naman ako.”

“Just asking.”

“Eh, ikaw ba? Never gone to dates?”

“Never. Until today. Maybe.”

“Maybe?”

“Perhaps.”

“Perhaps?”

“Nevermind.”

“Hmm,” responded Arem as to not give himself away. He could not breathe, like at all. He felt like everything he ate so far has been affected by what Manuel just implied. All of his insides started to do some kind of ‘gulugulu’ thing that he doesn’t like at all.

He wanted to ask or say something but soon enough, Manuel was already handing his card to the waiter. That meant, their day was done. Officially.

* * *

Manuel noticed that Arem has been fidgeting a bit the moment they stepped out of the resto. They were waiting for an elevator that will bring them back down to the ground floor. Arem looked almost green, his lips already turned downward. It was not the sight he wanted to see.

“Manuel?”

“Yes, Arem?”

“Uuwi na tayo, ‘di ba?” Arem’s eyes were bright as he looked at Manuel.

“Well, do you want to go home?”

“Uh…”

“It’s fine if you want to.”

“Hmm…”

“If you don’t want to go home, that’s fine too. You can still be with me.”

“How?”

Manuel looked away as reflex, “Maybe I already booked a room here.”

“A room? Here?”

“I thought if we were to go home, we might be caught up in the late-night traffic. Might as well spend the evening and go back early tomorrow. But I wouldn’t even mention if you really wanted to go home.”

“Ah. So, that’s how it is. Then… I guess that’s fine. You booked twin sharing naman, ‘di ba?”

“Oh. About that…”

Arem could not believe his eyes the moment they opened the door with the keycard, already carrying their bags inside. He still slipped his feet out of his sneakers and padded into the one-bed hotel room.

He repeated that inside his head over and over and over.

There was only one bed.

“Ah, sorry. I can ask for a futon and sleep on the floor,” said Manuel.

“The fuck, why? Panindigan mo ‘to, Manuel. No running away.”

“Whaaaa…?”

“Ikaw nag-book ng isang higaan, ah. Ikaw humiga.”

“I booked it for us!”

“Then, let’s both sleep on the bed! Kala mo naman kay hirap hirap!”

“Uh…”

“Parang tanga ‘to. Hindi naman kita kakainin. I’m sure you don’t believe that myth that I have fangs, right? I don’t. Well, on some occasions I might have. But for tonight, I don’t. Okay?”

“Okay.”

“Good,” Arem could not believe his newfound courage as he plopped himself on the bed. He tapped the huge space beside him. “Halika na.”

* * *

Weirdly remembering Neo and Salle because of the phrase, Manuel suddenly wanted out. What happened to his confidence?

“We should shower first. I packed clothes. For you, I think they also have disposable underwear and a shirt somewhere.”

“Hindi mo kasi sinabi na ganito, eh. Sana nagdala ako ng pamalit.”

“I never was sure that you’d actually want to do this with me.”

Manuel immediately heard coughing. He wanted to cough himself in shame from what he just said and its every implication with it that was ever known to humankind. It was worse because of where they actually are. He tried to salvage it all with, “So… Wanna go shower?”

That actually sounded worse. Way worse than both of them had expected.

“Ako na muna?” Arem asked, in hopes to help Manuel get past what he needs to.

“Oh. Okay. Yes, please. Okay. I’ll be here. Gonna wait,” he said. “I mean, yes, for my turn. After you finish, yes.”

Once Arem locked the bathroom door close, Manuel can finally take a breather. He crawled onto the bed, settling in the middle. The thought of sleeping beside someone he had no blood relations with was a bit surreal. His kuya most likely did, even platonically, sleeping beside his best buddies after a long night of drinking out. Him, on the other hand, never really involved himself in such affairs on an almost nightly basis.

Hence, the lack of certain… things.

Grabbing the remote control from the bedside table, he pressed open the big LCD TV on the other side of the room. Moans immediately filled the air, coming from the porn being shown on the screen. He groaned as he immediately turned it off. Now all he wanted to clean his eyes with alcohol. Or maybe holy water. Better yet, muriatic acid.

He opened his phone instead, checking out his social media accounts. As expected, there were only a few interactions. His Messenger, though, has been blowing up. Perhaps it was from the fact that ever since he and Arem embarked on their little journey, they never really checked their phones or initiated contact with anyone else but each other.

Of course, people would wonder where they were sooner or later. Libby and his kuya were the ones who sent them so many personal messages. Most of the others had just been tagging them in all of the group chats they were in.

**Babe ni Neo** : _@Manuel @Arem, wer dafaq r u guys?_

 **Labidabs ni Salle** : _I think they’re together._

 **MiaMia** : _AY WEH BAT DI KO ALAM TO HUUUUY KWENTO_

 **LuzViMindo** : _Sinasabi yata ni Neo na magkasama sila. Kung nasaan man sila sa lupalop ng mundo._

 **I_Will_End_Ur_Career_XOXO** : _What’s lupalop? @Manuel_

 **I_Will_End_Ur_Career_XOXO** : _Seenzoned!_

 **LuzViMindo** : _Haha. San kayo? @Manuel @Arem_

 **MiaMia** : _Sure kayong hindi sila nasa date? If they were, WAG NYO SILANG GULUHIN_

 **MiaMia** : _FOR FUCKS SAKE LEAVE THEM ALONE_

 **MangTomas** : _@Asia, lupalop means continent. Or just a faraway land._

 **I_Will_End_Ur_Career_XOXO** : _Oooooohhhhhh. Nice. Thanks, @Tomas!_

**Babe ni Neo** : _Gago baka kasi na-kidnap sila. Malay ninyo. Dangerous na kaya sa labas._

 **Labidabs ni Salle** : _I don’t think so._

 **LuzViMindo** : _Ako rin._

 **Labidabs ni Salle** : _Oh?_

 **LuzViMindo** : _Ah. Kasi andaming ni-re-reserve ni @Manuel last week. I wondered why. Tas, ayun. Biglang sinabi ni @Arem kay Yue na aalis siya for a day. Baka kasi yun yun._

 **YoBoiManuel** : _Kuya, I hope you’re aware tagging me in your gossiping._

 **YoBoiManuel** : _Also, what’s with the nickname?_

 **LuzViMindo** : _See? Edi sumagot ka rin. Success!!_

 **YoBoiManuel** : _Ah._

A notification for a personal message dinged. He tapped to see it. It was from someone he never expected. He opened the message, his stomach rumbling a little bit.

**Tomas** : _Manuel._

 **Manuel** : _What is it? Is everything okay?_

 **Tomas** : _Hehe. Nevermind. Maybe you’re busy?_

 **Manuel** : _Not really. I can entertain a concern of yours. Maybe two. Or more._

 **Tomas** : _Thanks, Manuel._

 **Manuel** : _Okay. So, what is it?_

 **Tomas** : _I just have a question. About Phil. We rarely go out just the two of us recently. I want that to happen. Just like you did for Arem._

 **Manuel** : _Okay. And?_

 **Tomas** : _I thought you would be able to help me. Only if it’s okay with you._

Ah. But this, he was already used to. He should be used to this, by now.

**Manuel** : _It’s okay._

 **Tomas** : _Yay! Thanks._

 **Manuel** : _So, what do you want to do?_

 **Tomas** : _Can I call you?_

 **Manuel** : _Okay._

A heartbeat passed until Manuel’s phone started to ring. He answered the call as he slipped out of the bed, walked and slid open the glass door and stepped out of the room’s small balcony. He pressed the phone against his ear. The voice he found the cutest in the world filled his left ear.

“Manueeeeeel. Help me! I want Phil to be happy. Enjoy a day with me! How did you even plan yours? I’d really, really like to know. There are just so many things I wanna do! But I don’t know which of them would make him enjoy his time the best!”

Manuel hummed, trying to recall the preparations he’d made for this day. And hopefully, tomorrow as well. He looked out and saw the volcano, “The first thing is you make them agree to go with you. Let him trust you enough to let you hold his hand and bring him to where you want to bring them. Places you want to show them. Things you want them to experience. Emotions you want them to feel.”

“Ah! So deep. I don’t know if I can do all that!”

“It’s not easy but it’s simple. Next is, you need to know him best. Know his favorites. Know where he really wants to go. And just… bring him there. He’s sure to enjoy it. Even though they may think they shouldn’t be there. Or that they may think they don’t deserve such treatment. That they don’t deserve to be where you brought him to.”

“Ah! It is hard!”

“I know it is,” said Manuel. “But you also have to trust him too. That he would be able to enjoy everything. That he’d be happy that you’re alone together. It’s the best feeling I have had so far.”

“You’re such a romantic, Manuel! So cool.”

Manuel found himself in realization. He smiled at the soft breeze against his cheeks, “Thanks, Tomas. Anything for the person I have come to really admire.”

“Good luck with him, then!”

“Yeah, you too. Bye.”

“Bye!”

He put down his phone as the call ended with a beep.

“Manuel?”

He looked back and saw Arem in short disposable boxers and an oversized white shirt. He looked really nice, even with just that.

“Hey.”

“Tumawag si Tomas?”

“Yeah, he did. It was just about something.”

“Ah, I see. Pwede ka na nga pala mag-shower,” replied Arem as he rubbed his hair with the towel. “I’ll… go to bed na.”

“Sleepy? You can go ahead if you want. It’s fine.”

Manuel walked past Arem and he wondered if how long the other guy was standing there. Did he hear anything? If he did, was he able to understand what was said? Or maybe he didn’t hear anything. Maybe he wasn’t standing there long enough. At this point, Manuel can only hope.

Anything for the person he has come to admire.

* * *

Arem can remember it so clearly. Maybe it was because it just happened around ten minutes ago because five minutes ago was when he heard the water from the shower.

_“Thanks, Tomas. Anything for the person I have come to really admire.”_

Tomas must have said something. Good night? Thanks? I admire you, too?

_“Yeah, you too. Bye.”_

It was hard to not know. At least before, Arem was fairly sure that he and Manuel had the same status as him. Utterly hopeless with their crush, the same person they want to give their affection to. It was easy to be with Manuel then, because Arem can be confident that they’re both suffering a broken heart from feelings that can never be returned.

But now? Arem can never be so sure. Maybe something did happen between him and Tomas and this trip can be a farewell trip? Can be a trip that implies that Manuel was about to leave him to this state he was in.

Though, he can already really highly doubt that he was in the same state as before, the state when he founded his friendship with Manuel. Things already changed.

Especially what he felt just now.

Instead of feeling a bit jealous of Manuel because he just got a call from Tomas, it was weirdly the other way around. He felt a sting in his chest that maybe Manuel was already leaving him here. That Manuel may be going somewhere else and that they can never be alone together anymore. That Manuel can never feel the same way if their positions were reversed.

He looked around to check on his phone when he realized he left his glasses inside the shower room. He slipped off the bed and knocked on the bathroom door.

“Manuel? I think I left my glasses somewhere there.”

“I saw them by the sink.”

“Is the door open?”

“Yes. I actually forgot to lock. You can get them if you want.”

Arem’s heartbeat went askew. He took a deep breath and opened the door. Exactly the moment Manuel said, “Just a minute, though!”

There he was. Manuel, wet and gorgeous, in all of his glory. His birthday suit, is what they usually call it, right?

Shrieking loudly, Arem jumped ten feet up the air and sped away. Yelling a hearty apology, he jumped into the bed and covered himself with the comforter, hoping that the bed will swallow him down to hell and wishing that the image can vanish forever.

* * *

Manuel was still flushed and breathing hard as the stepped out of the bathroom in fresh clothes. He saw the lump on the bed that was Arem under the covers. He must have been so embarrassed. Manuel had never been really shy of his body. He knew he can be on par with his older brother when it comes down to it, but he just never felt the need to flaunt it.

Arem seeing all of him, though, had sent him into a bit of a frenzy.

The younger man even left his glasses on the sink. The thing he even went for in the first place. Manuel had chuckled as he took the glasses and set it down by the lamp. Arem was unmoving under the covers even as Manuel crawled beside him after turning off most of the lights. Curious, Manuel shook him lightly.

No response.

Manuel slipped into the same covers and saw that the guy already fell asleep. He must have been tired feeling all that adrenaline. Arem was breathing evenly without his signature mask on. Manuel wondered how many people saw his face save for his family members, like Yue. Or how long does he spend around people without it? He wanted to know for reasons too selfish to admit to anyone.

But he knows it himself that it was because he wanted to be the best, all the bests possible, to Arem. Facing the other, Manuel willed himself to sleep. They can still have tomorrow for them both, was the thought he brought into his slumber.

Manuel groggily opened his eyes. It was thankfully still early in the morning, but he immediately knew that they have to hit the road real soon.

He can hardly breathe against Arem’s chest as the other guy had wrapped his arms around his neck and his legs around his torso like a koala usually do. It was tight and warm and nice. Manuel can get used to this.

“Yawa,” he muttered.

Now that they have done this, there would be no way in both heaven and hell that he can forget the feeling. And tremendously miss it once they go back to their real worlds. The whole trip seemed like a dream anyway.

He looked at Arem’s sleeping face. His features were as peaceful as they can be as his dreams borrowed him from Manuel. He willed Arem to wake up, to come back to him, to be with him. Wishing did not cut it though. First, he had to evade the urge to nuzzle his nose with his. So, Manuel the best solution he came up with. He moved to break away from Arem’s tight embrace.

This immediately woke him up. Arem’s blinked once, twice, thrice. He was reorienting himself to where he was. When he did, he gasped and looked at Manuel.

He covered his eyes with his palms, “Sorry for last night! Pramis, hindi ko talaga sinadya! Pramis, Manuel. I never had the intention to do anything of that sort! I never even thought about it ever!”

“Never thought about it?” His tone was teasing, but Manuel felt uncomfortable, not well about the thought that Arem never thought about anything about that. Anything about him.

Arem, already out of character because of the situation they were in, started to mumble, “Of course not! Especially not like that! I don’t want to! You’re…you’re… You’re in love with someone else and that would be weird! It’s gonna be weird for you, too, right? That someone can think about that, but you don’t really like them like that! That’s just creepy!”

“Creepy?”

“Yes! Also, kelan tayo alis?”

“After breakfast. I’ll call room service if you don’t want to go out for their breakfast buffet.”

“Buffet?” Arem removed his hands from his palms.

“Yes, buffet. Let’s go.”

“Then, after that?”

“We’ll celebrate.”

Arem smiled for the first time in the morning and for Manuel, it was definitely brighter than any ray of light passing through the folds of the curtain. He doesn’t care anymore. He shouldn’t because nothing really changed with him.

He was still, and forever will be, admiring someone he won’t be able to close the gap between them. Admiring someone who won’t look at him in that way. But this time, it was stronger. More powerful.

* * *

By the time they arrived at the stadium, the program was already starting. This time they were lucky enough to have a parking space available for the car. The place was already covered inch by wonderful inch by colors of the rainbow, by the blues, the pinks, the violets, the yellows, and all of the colors that fight in order to make the world a better place for everyone.

Especially for the most special kind of love.

The volunteers and the organizers were all smiling and joyful the moment they stepped into the stadium to enter the place. After they registered at the entrance as walk-ins, Manuel headed immediately to the merchandise booth.

Soon enough, they were both wearing Pride shirts and matching caps. Manuel was holding the big rainbow flag he bought, which was still inside its packaging, as they made their way to the crowd. People were smiling and greeting them every so often with a happy, “Happy Pride!”

Arem could not help but have his spirits lifted up uncontrollably. The gay happiness must be very contagious.

On the stage, the Marikina City mayor was finishing his opening remarks. He was yelling, “Kung wala kayo, walang kulay ang mundo! Kung wala kayo, walang ikagaganda ang mundo! Kung wala kayo, walang tunay na pagmamahal ang mundo!”

Everyone cheered. Arem was grinning from ear to ear behind his mask. It was a new feeling. He liked it.

A part of the crowd dispersed after the opening remarks as the hosts took over. Manuel and Arem followed the people, exploring the stalls and the booths around the stadium. On the grass, groups of friends were taking pictures donning their gay paraphernalia made of nothing but proud colors. They all looked beautiful in Arem’s eyes.

“Hi. Happy Pride to you both!” A plump woman chirped at them, trying to get them to their booth. “Those are free so you guys can grab as much as you need!”

Much to Arem’s embarrassment, it was the Durex booth. And the freebies were, of course, packs of condoms and lube in sachets.

“Go on,” said the smiling woman. “It’s free!”

Some couples already grabbed some quickly as they passed by. No one lingered around but them. Arem was surprised when Manuel, with a very emotionless expression, grabbed some lube and condoms. He then put all of them into his pockets.

“Are you guys together?” The woman asked. “You guys look cute together kasi, eh! I miss my girlfriend, actually. Her parents are strict so I’m just gonna march for us today. I love her so much!”

“Ah…” Arem did not know what to say.

“We’re not together,” Manuel said.

She was genuinely surprised as she looked at them back and forth, “Oh! Sorry about that! Akala ko lang pala ‘yun…”

“Well,” Manuel chuckled as he glanced at Arem before looking at the small plump woman. “If he’ll have me, then why the hell not? I wouldn’t be able to refuse.”

“Woah! Good luck to you both, then! Happy Pride, you guys. I wish that the two of you can be happy together!”

Manuel nodded, “You and your girlfriend, too.”

They were already walking away to the food stalls when Arem realized he had reverted into his auto-pilot mode. His brain was forcefully shut down the moment Manuel engaged in conversation with the woman. Maybe it was in the middle of shutting down when Manuel placed lube and condoms into the pockets of his jeans. But what turned all of his processes off was when the woman asked if they were actually together and Manuel had to answer something like that.

Now, he could not even look at Manuel’s general direction. He was too flustered to function for a second. His cheeks were aflame and his palms sweaty. His chest was tight enough that it was already pressing against his vocal cords, rendering him speechless.

“Oh, the march is starting!”

Manuel grabbed Arem’s hand, lacing their fingers together as he stepped in line with the other marchers. It was all beautiful, the way people come together like this to fight for love, to fight for the ones out to hurt the love they were meant to share, the love they were meant to celebrate, the love they were meant to fight for.

As Arem looked down at their intertwined hands, sharing the warmth of Manuel’s, maybe it really was worth fighting for.

* * *

Manuel was worried. If he were to be honest, he could not enjoy the march at all. He was too worried. He was deep into the zone of overthinking. He was holding Arem’s hand and the warmth they were sharing was making him feel the other as a presence that represents stability. His heart feels it and it was making him worried.

Was this really okay? What will their group say about this? If they were to be together… If they ever will. It seemed not plausible right now as Arem may still harbor feelings towards another. Manuel kept on recalling the eyes that leaked a little bit of hurt and jealousy when Arem asked about Tomas calling. 

Maybe he was jealous of him and hurt because Tomas called? Because Manuel can have more chances to actually have conversations with him? Manuel does not have the slightest idea on what Arem really feels about all of this. Maybe he was even just kind enough to tag along with him on this trip. Maybe he agreed because he promised and felt guilty to break it.

After all, was Arem forcing himself for them to be alone together?

It continued to nag Manuel until Arem squeezed his hand, “Uy, okay ka lang? Para kang nahihilo. Want water? Gusto mo stopover muna tayo d’yan sa malapit na 7-Eleven?”

“Ah. No need. Thanks for the concern.”

“Eh, ikaw? Any concerns?”

“Wala naman…”

“Ako meron,” said Arem as his eyes suddenly got serious. “It’s about Tomas.”

“Yes?”

“Are you guys talking regularly?”

“What? Of course not. You know I’m bad at constant communication.”

“But was he the person worth doing that constant communication with?”

Manuel frowned as he could not follow here Arem was trying to bring the conversation. He looked at Arem, “No. I thought he was but when I talk to him on the phone or on Messenger, it gets a bit awkward for me.”

“Dummy, that’s what happens when you have a crush on someone.”

“Sure, I guess, but not every time.”

“Ha?”

“Ha?”

“Hakdog!” Arem followed up as he jabbed Manuel’s shoulder with his, “Pero seryoso na nga. What do you mean by not every time?”

“There are times that you can be awkward and embarrassing and uncool when you’re alone with them or talking to them through any means possible. But if you like them enough, that should not matter anymore. The feeling was too much to focus on that awkwardness and everything else,” said Manuel.

“Ah. Have you felt that with him?”

“With the person I really like?”

“Yes… That person.”

“Yes, of course.”

“Oh.”

“Have you?”

“The person that I… like?”

“Hmm?”

“Yes.”

“I see.”

“You know, Tomas was really cute. I admired him for a long time now. It was a real crush.”

“I know. I felt the same. He really was cute for me. I don’t think that will change, but…”

“But this time…”

“Yes, this time…”

“It’s different, the urges I feel with the person I like right now. I’m frightened, though.”

“Scary, huh? I can feel that same exact feeling… with the person I really like. Right now.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

The moment they looked at each other’s eyes, seeing each other as if it was the first time ever, was the moment the crowd cheered. They have gone back to where they were, the end where they started. Manuel was perfectly fine with that.

* * *

Hours later as all of the programs, and even the concert, began to end, as the rest of the day went by in a soft and colorful blur, Arem fails to feel tired. He was even full of energy as the performers sang and the audience sang back. The last song was about to begin. The opening had everyone cheering as they identified the classic song.

Arem could not help but glance at Manuel as the chorus came on. He looked away as he sang along.

_Akin ka na lang_

_Akin ka na lang_

And then looked back.

_Iingatan ko ang puso mo_

Only to look away again.

_Akin ka na lang_

_Akin ka na lang_

But he could not help but look at him right back. He had to look away again.

_Wala nang hihigit pa sa’yo_

Arem could no longer take control of his feelings. He reached out to pinch at Manuel’s sleeve as the fireworks started to parade colors and light.

“Pretty,” murmured Manuel but he was looking at Arem. How did he know? That was because he was looking right back at him.

With the coolest move ever, Manuel opened the rainbow flag and enveloped their heads into the colors. The fireworks were just distant explosions compared to the loud thumping of Arem’s chest as Manuel brought their faces closer. He could not breathe, like literally.

Manuel nuzzled his nose with his over Arem’s mask, “Can I?”

The only thing Arem had to do was to pull his mask down. Manuel melded their lips together. It was not a smash or something really passionate and hard. It was soft, colorful. Arem snaked his arms around Manuel’s neck for them to get more access into each other’s mouths as the rainbow-colored flag gave them the privacy, allowed them to share the most intimate space possible for them both.

“Go somewhere with me,” murmured Manuel against him as their sweet kiss loosened just a fraction.

Arem moved to cup both of Manuel’s cheeks, “I don’t know where you’re going.”

“Me, too. I don’t know where to go too.”

This made Arem giggle, a sound that joined the wonders of the fireworks. “Pero… simula ngayon, you can’t go anywhere without me. Okay? Don’t leave me behind?”

“Wouldn’t dare. I won’t go anywhere if it was not us.”

“Us sounds good,” Arem replied as he nibbled at Manuel’s lower lip.

“It really, really does.”

“Let’s ruin some roads soon.”

“As long as we build them again and make them ours, sure.”

When they locked lips once more, their world was filled with exploding warmth and colors that can never end.

**Author's Note:**

> excited to hear from all of you thru the comment box!! leave kudos as well if you liked it!!
> 
> yalls can reach me thru my [twitter!!](http://www.twitter.com/cheyalinn)


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